Next week we’ll be running our B+ to A+ Senior English workshop and discussing practical strategies for improving student writing. One of the basic strategies we’ll be discussing is surface level vs. deeper level analysis. In their essays, students most often say only one thing about any piece of evidence they insert into an essay. This means that their discussion can be limited to only the most obvious sort of analysis. However, we can scaffold students to use their evidence in more sophisticated ways and challenge them to greater insight into their analysis. Let’s have a look at some examples from different styles of writing:
Persuasive Writing
- Basic analysis
One quarter of all children in Australia are currently classified as either overweight or obese. This shows us that we must introduce a sugar tax to raise the price of soft drinks and make it harder for children to buy soft drink.
OR
- Detailed analysis
One quarter of all children in Australia are currently classified as either overweight or obese. At its most basic level, this piece of evidence suggests that we must act quickly. However, this evidence also indicates that becoming overweight is increasingly a normal part of childhood in Australia and that we, as a society, must change the way we think about sugar and introduce a sugar tax.
Analysis of Argument
- Basic analysis
By describing packaging as ‘superfluous’, Walker indicates to her audience that we should avoid plastic packaging because it is used more than it needs to be.
OR
- Detailed analysis
By describing packaging as ‘superfluous’, Walker indicates to her audience not only that plastic should be avoided because it is used more than it needs to be, but also that it is an extravagance that we cannot afford in our lives.
- Comparing texts
Basic analysis
Unlike Priam, Mandela does not have to undertake a journey to forgive others, because he already learned this during his ‘9000 days’ in prison.
OR
- Detailed Analysis
While at first glance it seems that Mandela does not have to undertake a journey to forgive others like Priam does, a more careful interpretation leads to the conclusion that Mandela’s ‘9000 days’ in prison involves an inward journey of self-examination and reflection.
The phrases below will help students engage in surface and deeper level writing practice for persuasive, comparative or text response writing.
Phrases to introduce first analysis | Phrases to introduce second level analysis |
At its most basic level, this …suggests…
At first glance, this… tells us… While the most obvious interpretation of this data is… On the one hand, this evidence seems… …not only… |
However, this evidence also indicates…
On a more critical level we can also see… It also demonstrates that… But on the other, this information also indicates… …but also… …a more careful interpretation leads to the conclusion… |